Mankind is failing.

This is not an easy thought to translate into words, much less one that is explained well by anyone. I remember the images in my youth giving me insight to the future. Who I'd be and how to get there. Innocent and determined. That person, I'd convinced myself, would never make it in the real world. So I undertook the task of desensitizing myself. Making myself invulnerable to the world and its woes. It's a mistake that I wish often I'd never made.

No matter how numb I've made myself, there are things I still feel, and with great intensity. An unyeilding urge to help my fellow man. It is what drives me. I am guilty, though, of causing great harm, and when I did it willingly, I thought I was numb enough to ignore the shame. I was quite wrong.

I also feel great disappointment in the world. When your driving force is helping the world...fighting for a better place worth living in...and the whole world is in turmoil, tearing itself apart...it's not easy. It's depressing, really. Hearing every day how new atrocities are born...and then made commonplace is enough to make just about anyone want to give up. I, however, will not give up.

I am not afraid of taking action. I am not squemish about taking violent action, either. I will not stand for the mayhem of the present. People stand by watching the horrors of the world before their very eyes and do nothing to stop them. Out of fear. Out of shock. Or simply because they don't know what to do. I was a bully as a very small child and I'd chase other children around...and when I'd caught them..I let them go because I didn't know what to do... I'm no longer a bully. And I know exactly what to do.

I will not sit still and quiet letting my fellow man get decapitated on the bus. I will not stand by while classmates are murdered in school. I will not let the fires of Hell burn on Earth while I have the water to put them out. However, too many people are willing to do nothing. Cozy in their laissez-faire mantra. It's wrong and it's part of the problem.

We are letting our fear take us over. Our rights are being taken from us and we don't care. Why? Because if we take away from everyone, the few willing to do something will take care of it? Take pride in your right to be free by acting when required. Do not be dependent on others to be right. Make yourself what is right. It is not tough, and we all know what it is. It's not some abstract thought so difficult to comprehend. I would rather die doing what's right than live as a coward. If the world had more like that, no man woman or child living a good life should have to die.

Reason. Logic. Common sense. All intelligence is leaving us. Abandoned for the dollar...imprisioned by a society willing to use poverty and despair as its foundation. This society we have built for ourselves is dimming those last rays of light in our souls that are still keeping us good. We need to find a new way. Not in a hundred years. Now. Before this damage becomes more than a recoverable wound.

I simply pray that I receive the guidance I need to help and not hinder. That I'm humble enough to take the advice. That I'm strong enough to endure it...and that others, too, will come out of their comas.

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