If I would have come across the beautiful Lisa a little earlier in my life, it is quite possible that we would be well on our way to marriage now. However, I'm not looking for anything along such lines these days. And as much as I have changed over the years, one thing has not shifted. One thing has only strengthened. My morals.

It would be cold of me to not have broken it off. It would have been cruel to of kissed her when she was looking for it. And it would have been unforgivable to take from her something so meaningful when I'm questing for the inane. I wish to help her strengthen herself, but I don't think I'd be successful at that as anything more than just a sideline admirer.

Breaking it off with her is among the top ten hardest things I've ever done in my life. But I am proud that I had the courage to do it the right way. To be honest and forward about it all. I'm sure she doubts my sincerity, but I know that no matter what...I did this relative stranger a great favor. It would have ended, for my interests are elsewhere, and it would have been worse with every passing moment I let it carry on.

That is one thing I can say for myself. No matter how much time has passed... No matter what I've been through... No matter what my interests are... I will not fail the morals I've set for myself long ago. As much as I've changed by one cause or another, I have remained the essentially same person through all of it.

Side note: It is more than likely a different "it" that I refer to when I say this, but nothing is worth it.

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Heart vs mind.