This entire week has been a single flourescent night. I have not seen the sun, so I do not know the seperation of days. I have abandoned daylight and adopted hanging light bulbs as my keeper.

Work has been keeping me late and brining me in early. It is a miracle, literally, that I am not at work as I type this, now. Even so, I know this coming week brings only more of the same. I know that free time will be words at war with each other. I accept it.

My peers are learning, progressing and partying.. For every new thing my peers learn, I replace an engine for the hundreth time. For every bit of progression they make, I sink a little lower into aggrivated complacency. And for every party my peers attend, I attend a somber memorial.

When they come and ask me, "Do you want to re-enlist?" I will stare at them exultant in my "How dare you ask me that" claim. I still have a bit to learn, but I'll be done soon. I can hardly wait.

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And that's that.
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Heart vs mind.